Thursday, January 12, 2017
Here's something I'll probably do various times; look back and modify previous 'thought' posts.
My personal Church is rather untraditional; focusing less on by-the-books tradition and guideline, and more on direct religious focus. I see the typical structured version more informational, whereas the latter is more 'celebratory'.
I sat solemnly, munching slowly on cheese fries and sipping Dr. Pepper. As an upbeat pop-rock jam balred on the stage below the Cafe loft I occupied, I couldn't help but breath in the atmosphere. A unique sense of both appreciation for that far above us, and of a close-to-home interpretation intended to spread the joyous inflections to both the intent, and to the listener.
The dancing individuals, unashamed - proud - of their praise, the chatting elderly likely recalling countless experiences in their lives, the children scurrying about... as I absorbed the world around me, many feet above the aforementioned peoples, I almost felt as if I'd seen earth from Heaven's point of view, watching intently as the peoples below act so intricately and purely.
All these walks of life, joined under one solid, unifying belief... it somehow gave me more faith. Not only in the blatant religious sense, but in the purpose of humanity. I began urgently marking down these impacts upon a torn envelope; what I saw, who I saw, what they were doing. Desperate to find why it suddenly mattered to me.
As I overlooked by observations, I began trying to decipher why they had happened as they had. What did it mean to me?
It was then that my previous belief that those we encounter in our lives only exist to impact us was crushed. Seeing the happiness and energy bustling about surrounding me, I finally saw myself not as the game, but as just another player. Perhaps my subverted opinion on 'reality' was, ironically, far too simple. Far too easily constructed. Perhaps rather than simply only influence the mind one exists within, we all influence each other, systematically and mechanically.
These influences are something of a God-given purpose; they can be as little as being particularly friendly, or enjoying a certain movie, or wearing a color. We are not alone at all; we are simultaneously sculpting one another. It makes waking up so much more enthralling when you see that there is a purpose for you to walk, to talk, to exist; even if that purpose may seem arbitrary, it could effect someone or something in an indescribable way.
I've somewhat decided, based on this, to no longer focus totally only pon my happiness - often, a top priority for me. I see I should use that feeling to lighten others, as well. To incite a laugh, inspire a smile, so much as an unimportant scoff; that small pleasure can not only make you a better person, but can also improve someone else's day.
There's a lot more to life than individual human desire. Perhaps it is a one-player game in some aspects - one of acceptance, and one of personal inescapability. But one in which, with enough thought, you can choose to win.
Whether or not this was a realization caused by Cheese Fries and Dr. Pepper, I may never know.